I will die.
Somewhere in the field of time
On a map where X already marks the spot,
I am drawing my last breath.
I am closing my eyes
For the very last time.
So much is uncertain,
Undecided yet, but this is not.
Whose hand will I grasp
As death leads me away?
Not alone, not cold, not in pain,
Please not that. Let it be as I have lived
– a woman rooted in the heart of life.
None of this I know.
But I do know that I will meet death.
It is certain. The wheel will turn.
Will I remember this Now moment
When my heart beats its last?
It is bittersweet to contemplate
One’s own demise.
It elicits a tenderness,
A soft almost maternal love
For this name, this identity
That intuitively pens a poem
On death. But it is also
A poem about life’s vibrant rush,
Life’s inexhaustible urge to create anew.
I can only die because I have lived,
And I must die to live again and again.
Now, in this very moment,
I live and die and live again
As my lungs and heart dictates:
You are not done yet, live longer
Live deeper, live truer.
And when what’s done is truly done,
Over and out for this incarnation,
Less than a heartbeat passes
Before I breathe new life
Into the skin, bones and blood
Of a new beginning.
Remember me if you can, new life living itself.
Remember me and remind yourself
That death is more friend than foe.
My death allows you to live and love.
So although I may mourn at life’s end,
It is given, this one glorious life, to you.
It is my gift to creation,
This idea of personhood expressing itself
Dipping and drinking deeply
From the sea of infinite possibility.
Unconditionally, I pass the mantle on to you.
Even while I still breathe,
I acknowledge that you will be and I,
What will I be? A memory? A cellular imprint?
Or alluded to in visions that hint of a former self?
I sense you already, as a seed within my
Dreams, a shadow at the edge of sleep.
Can you feel me giving way to you?
Accommodating you because I
Understand the difference between
Karma and destiny?
Celebrate all that lies before you.
And remember, if you fear death,
You will fear life too, because in every
Life well lived, we must learn to die.
Learn to love death, to walk with it,
Because it surely walks with you.
Allow death to greet you,
Permit it to teach you how to rise
Anew in every fresh and pristine moment.
© Sue Claughton, 2016