Seesawing, or non-abiding awakening, is a stepping stone towards abiding enlightenment. Anyone who relates to the “I got it/I lost it” scenario should be encouraged not demotivated. It’s a process until it isn’t anymore. Back and forth, to and fro, a cyclical path that spirals ever upwards.
Being okay with the lost it phase is just as important, more so in a way, than appreciating the got it phase. Learning to witness what the ego reaches for and grasps too tightly and letting go of even the need or desire to stay in the perceived hallowed ground is where the magic happens. Realising that even though it feels like we are falling in and out of grace, this feeling is only true because we believe in it. It’s a superficial truth at best, that seems to grow in potency the more we feed it with our energy. Noticing is enough. It’s a wave on the surface. Deep, deep down below these fluctuations, the truth of who we are is unalterable, unchanging, unassailable.
Cosmic memory reminds us that as co-creators, we choose our experience in every moment. Choosing the emotion, the energy around every happening in our reality, is where our real power resides. It feels like a paradox to simultaneously go with the flow in a state of allowing and step proactively into the creative process to create from choice, but it’s not. It’s not a role we play, it’s beyond roles.