Tag Archives: Dark night of the soul

THIS TOO SHALL PASS

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What lies beneath a smile? It should be joy, peace, love and happiness. That’s exactly how it should be, but often it’s not the case. People use smiles to hide. It’s a way of saying that you’re okay, there’s no need to dig deeper. I’d love to know exactly what percentage of smiles are real and how many are fake. Do we choose to accept the face value of a smile? Or do we use our intuitive heart to discern what’s really going on?

Smiles can dam years of tears. Smiles can act like a STOP barrier, both from letting our true feelings out and keeping friends from helping us to heal.

During some of the darkest periods of my life, and I’ve really been down there, I’ve faced the world with a smile pinned to my face. It wasn’t a genuine smile, it was the glue that held my face together in a mask that the world wanted to see. The world can be a cold and busy place, and most people don’t have the time or inclination to really know us. So when people ask how you are, they don’t want an honest answer. What they really want is validation that everything is a-ok.

And if you run out of steam and allow your face to slump, you often get the order – smile, it won’t kill you comment – or a variation thereof. I don’t know about you, but nothing bugs me more than people demanding smiles to order.

Smiling when you are in deep emotional pain is insane. I won’t do it anymore. If you don’t want to see my pain, you know where the door is. There is nothing to fear from sadness and pain – not yours or anyone else’s. Yet people behave as if it’s contagious.

When you are deeply and authentically rooted in genuine happiness, as averse to playing out some psychotic Disneyland cheap copy of happiness, you can do immense good with your happiness. Your happiness can give people real hope, especially if you’ve been to hell and back in order to get there. It shows others that “this too shall pass” in a very real way.

Dark Night Of The Soul

dark nightI have never felt as loved as I do right now. Everything in my life is falling into place, one beautiful piece at a time. I’m not writing this to gloat, I am sharing this to bring hope to anyone that is in a very dark place. Last year was my dark night of the soul, my year from hell. I was in pain, despondent and directionless in many ways.


But here I am now, in the most beautiful of places. And I got here by completely letting go of what I thought I needed and wanted. I got out of my own way and allowed the Universe to flow through me. I became quiet and I really listened. I listened to my inner voice/higher self/intuition and I did as I was asked. When I stopped fighting the flow and let go, the flow washed me clean and carried me to a new place, a place that was right for me.

I paid attention to outer signs and serendipitous events and learned to ride the flow that moved through me. I can honestly say that going with the flow is easy once you get started. Because you are riding the current rather than fighting against it, it takes far less effort and you build up a sort of excess of energy. And this energy or life force is then freed up for you to consciously create.

When things go wrong for you, not just one thing, but many things one after the other, it’s a sign that you are moving in the wrong direction. The Universe is trying to get your attention and it sets up all these little blocks to get you to stop. If you ignore these signals and carry on regardless, bigger things go wrong until you are forced to stop. That’s exactly what happened to me. I didn’t listen. I didn’t stop until I was forced to stop.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. If we pay attention to our inner and outer world, we can avoid a total collapse of our lives. Maybe for some of us, and certainly for me, our lives have to come crashing down in order for us to change emphasis and direction. If you’re like me and this is where you are now, allow it all. There’s no need to be afraid. Be like the Phoenix. You will arise from the ashes of your former life to create something new, something that is right for you.

And when you do begin to rebuild, you’ll know you are on the right path because it will feel right. You’ll feel like I do now – loved, supported, engaged and purposeful.

Namaste