What lies beneath a smile? It should be joy, peace, love and happiness. That’s exactly how it should be, but often it’s not the case. People use smiles to hide. It’s a way of saying that you’re okay, there’s no need to dig deeper. I’d love to know exactly what percentage of smiles are real and how many are fake. Do we choose to accept the face value of a smile? Or do we use our intuitive heart to discern what’s really going on?
Smiles can dam years of tears. Smiles can act like a STOP barrier, both from letting our true feelings out and keeping friends from helping us to heal.
During some of the darkest periods of my life, and I’ve really been down there, I’ve faced the world with a smile pinned to my face. It wasn’t a genuine smile, it was the glue that held my face together in a mask that the world wanted to see. The world can be a cold and busy place, and most people don’t have the time or inclination to really know us. So when people ask how you are, they don’t want an honest answer. What they really want is validation that everything is a-ok.
And if you run out of steam and allow your face to slump, you often get the order – smile, it won’t kill you comment – or a variation thereof. I don’t know about you, but nothing bugs me more than people demanding smiles to order.
Smiling when you are in deep emotional pain is insane. I won’t do it anymore. If you don’t want to see my pain, you know where the door is. There is nothing to fear from sadness and pain – not yours or anyone else’s. Yet people behave as if it’s contagious.
When you are deeply and authentically rooted in genuine happiness, as averse to playing out some psychotic Disneyland cheap copy of happiness, you can do immense good with your happiness. Your happiness can give people real hope, especially if you’ve been to hell and back in order to get there. It shows others that “this too shall pass” in a very real way.
Being awake isn’t a final destination in itself. There are many, many layers to awakening. The further you progress, the more you feel like an outsider, an alien in your own culture, country and even planet.
You will be judged mad and delusional. But you KNOW. You know that this world we live in is masked by lies and illusions. And the unravelling of one lie leads to another. Everything you have been taught is revealed as programming. But you can’t go back to a state of compliant ignorance, you don’t want that. So, in a very real way, you feel alone.
But there is something that I have discovered that makes things easier to bear. And that is that love crosses the gulf between those that are awake and those that are still caught in the deception. Love permeates everything. Even if you live in a family, town or country where everyone still sleeps, you can still connect with them meaningfully through your heart. You can still be nourished and nourish each other by heart to heart connections of love. This is by design, sacred design.
So although you may well FEEL alone, know that this is only illusion. Right at the heart of everyone, love lives. Love lives free of the illusions, lies and manipulation of this world. It is the one aspect of each of us that is untainted. 💖
That thing, the one hidden in the shady recesses of your mind. That thing that keeps you awake at night. That thing that subtly takes the edge off life. That thing that stops you being whole and happy until you’ve eradicated it, defeated it, transformed it, you know the “thing” I mean.
It’s the thing that makes you feel that you’re not quite good enough. And you’ve been waging war on that one thing that stops you being happy for most of your life. The thing that blocks you may be the same thing that you’ve been battling all your life, or your thing may change.
You may notice that once you overcome whatever it is that stops you being fully you, that another thing rises up to take its place and then you have to start all-over-again.
Or you could try something completely different. Instead of trying to iron out all your creases, you could try – for just one day – accepting and loving yourself with that big ugly shameful thing.
You could, just as a little experiment, try to love that thing that you’ve spent all your time hating and just see what happens. Or if you can’t summon up a little love for that thing that’s stopping you being gloriously perfect, you could try to accept that it’s part of you. And if you can’t quite do that either, you could imagine that the person you most love is afflicted by “your personal thing” and notice whether that makes you love them less.
Don’t waste your life trying to get rid of “that thing”, because you know what, there will always be something. Always. You are never ever going to get all your ducks in a row, well not for long anyway. The irony is, once you stop trying to be so damn perfect, you realise that your thing is trying to show you something. It’s trying to teach you the gift of unconditional love. And once you get it, all your annoying little flaws won’t seem to matter that much anyway.
I am a healer of worlds,
I am the ties that bind
Heart to high heart,
High heart to soul.
I am the sacred negotiator,
Who balances with harmony,
Who has no fear of hate.
I am the spell weaver
Of emotions, a heart surgeon
With a scalpel that never inflicts pain.
I show you a different way
To be whole, new yet weathered,
Tempered by my all
I bring light to the darkness
Of a cupped heart, held together
With dreams, hopes and years
Of tears. I melt barriers;
There is no disgrace
In feeling deeply into
Your scared and lonely place.
I take you there, I wait.
Time heals, wisdom is
For learning to recognise fate…
I am love because
There is no other way.
I fight the good fight
To liberate, to heal,
To allow you to dictate
How love will take shape
For you, for the life you create.
© Sue Claughton, 2016